Warning - negative thoughts in here!
I'm not sure what it is, but I just have the feeling that something isn't right today. I can't shake it, in fact it keeps getting stronger as the day goes on. I keep telling myself it's PMS - just some hormones playing games with my head.
Every once in a while I just want to pack up, grab my husband and leave for somewhere tropical and cheap and have adventures for the rest of our lives. Most of the time I love my life, but every now and again I just don't get the point of spending the whole day at work and then not doing a whole heck of a lot at night, because you need to rest up to go back to work and then when we do get free time it's spent working on the never ending projects around the house. Isn't it supposed to be about more than this? I suppose I do have fun most days, but it seems like all the reasons for living like this are always just out of reach - what's the point of building for a family when there is no family on the way yet?! I put off trying to get pregnant for so long because I didn't think we were "ready" yet. Now we're beyond ready - in fact I'm heading towards the other side of ready to the point where I am in danger of losing interest if too many more months pass us by.
There, I said it! I am tempted to erase those words, but I won't because that's how I feel in this moment. Maybe I will feel differently tomorrow, but right now that's just how it is. Yup, this is PMS alright!
Every once in a while I just want to pack up, grab my husband and leave for somewhere tropical and cheap and have adventures for the rest of our lives. Most of the time I love my life, but every now and again I just don't get the point of spending the whole day at work and then not doing a whole heck of a lot at night, because you need to rest up to go back to work and then when we do get free time it's spent working on the never ending projects around the house. Isn't it supposed to be about more than this? I suppose I do have fun most days, but it seems like all the reasons for living like this are always just out of reach - what's the point of building for a family when there is no family on the way yet?! I put off trying to get pregnant for so long because I didn't think we were "ready" yet. Now we're beyond ready - in fact I'm heading towards the other side of ready to the point where I am in danger of losing interest if too many more months pass us by.
There, I said it! I am tempted to erase those words, but I won't because that's how I feel in this moment. Maybe I will feel differently tomorrow, but right now that's just how it is. Yup, this is PMS alright!
posted by Jackie at 11:39 AM
1 Comments:
Jackie (((HUGS))) I know how you feel be it the pms talking or not, believe me I have been to the side of losing interest & why bother especially after all these years for me. Then something in my heart keeps bringing me back to do not give up. I don't mean to sound preachy but I am trying hard myself to truely believe these words (somedays are hard)that it will happen, it may not happen when we want it too, But in His time. I believe He has a plan, though we do not always understand it. (Sorry for the speech, this is just my feelings)
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