It doesn't seem real that we're actually going to be a family of four. I'm having trouble picturing it in my head. When I do picture it, it's only with Rick there helping out. The parts where I am coping with two on my own seem rather blurry. Maybe that's for the best!

In other ways it does seem real. Being able to listen to the heartbeat on the doppler is truly a blessing. In one more month I'll be halfway through the pregnancy and I think I'll be ready to send it back. And I've started feeling what I think are little kicks on my lower left side - last night and today. I can't help but think that this is the last time that I am going to be doing each of these things. Last doppler we'll rent, last time wearing maternity clothes (and thank goodness for that - I still can't stand them), last time I'll watch my belly swell to remarkable girth. Yes, we have decided to stop at two children. I know that Rick would love to have more but I think a family of four will be just perfect for us.

We took a bold step this weekend and bought something for baby...diapers. I can't believe that when we brought Sam home from the hospital we had only one pack of newborn diapers waiting. It took something like two days to use them all. Oh how little we knew. So I've started the diaper hoard, whenever they go on sale I'll be stocking up.

We also measured Sam's room and furniture this past weekend and planned out the only configuration that will work to cram two children into one bedroom in our house. I'm happy to say it's doable without too much hassle. Hopefully in the next two years we'll get our finances in order enough to move or to build an addition (which was the original plan, but alas we were slightly unprepared for some of the implications of Rick being self-employed...will we never learn?) I'm not letting our financial situation get me down. We're really not so bad off when I think about it, we just can't have everything we want right now and maybe there are other reasons for that beyond our current understanding. Like maybe Sam will really enjoy sharing his room for a while and maybe I'll even be working again in a couple of years and we'll be able to do something even better than we originally planned. The Universe always has a way of working things out I believe.

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Sam was the recipient of nasty wasp attack this morning. He innocently touched a cable box on our morning walk and came away crying and flapping his arm around like it was on fire. I brought him straight home and treated him with my amazing cure-all: lavender oil. He said it felt better right away and now, hours later, you can't even see the marks. Good old lavender oil - couldn't live without it.

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Thank you for your kind comments Jenn. I hope that everything is going really well for you!